My sister was getting married, my father was in hospital – and I realised my relationship was over

I suddenly saw that life wasn’t all that long and you should spend it with people you love. I made a private pact with myself, to stop lying. I would not marry him

My sister got married at Christmas so she wouldn’t have to bank on good weather. This is a very my-sister rationale: like her father before her, she is a worrier. She tries to contain her anxiety by planning for the worst.

The night before the wedding, my father fell on the stairs. My mother was unable to move him by herself and had to call her cousins for help. That night, she accepted what the rest of us had known for some time: she could no longer care for him at home. She had tried, but it was becoming dangerous for both of them.

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